The fine print

Warning: Although I graduated from our local University, with a Bachelor of Science in Criminal Justice and with a Minor certificate in Public Administration, I am, in no imaginable means, an authority in…well, anything. The following opinion (ahem, the whole post) may have possibly sparked debate in a Political Science class that I barely scraped by in (my brilliant Professor, Dr. Peang-Meth watched me struggle with “F-Negatives” the whole semester and in a weak and last minute moment gave me the “B” I finally earned on one of the last exams as my semester grade). However, it’s now just my quasi-entertaining thoughts that I figured I would post on my now sparse blog space. Consider yourself warned.

I heard the most ironic thing today. Joy Behar of The View was on CNN and on commenting on the influence of Joy McCain and Michelle Obama over their spouses Vice-Presidential picks, she stated,

“…whether they say it or not, I think that they do have some influence…What other reason is there to be married than to talk things over with your spouse?”

Gee, I thought people married because they wanted to spend the rest of their lives together. Or at most basic, to guarantee a sex partner for the rest of their lives. Teehee. Okay, I’m kidding…sort of. Wives do as what’s been popularly said they usually do. They tell their husbands what to do. Okay, I’m kidding again. Let’s see. Marriage for no reason other than to talk things over with your spouse. How ironic is that? What’s so ironic you ask? Well, the simple fact of course, that a man and a woman two people would find in each other the perfect companion to talk to for the rest of their lives…and then marry that person…only to more than likely not communicate with each other for the rest of their marriage! They “talk at each other” or my personal favorite, they “talk right through them”.

While I’m on the political topic…Michelle Obama’s speaking blunders have been in abundance lately. What with stating her husband is pathetic…

…or that she was finally proud of her country for the first time in her adult life. I’m not sure what’s worse. What Michelle Obama is saying or what Barack Obama is not saying. Are we not the least bit alarmed that our next President and Commander in Chief may possibly be someone whose name reminds us of the very reason why we must walk practically naked through metal detectors at the airport…or Gee! Hmm…why the father of my children has spent the last year in the deserts of Afghanistan? Barack Hussein Obama. President Osa…err…I mean, President Obama. I guess if we omit it long enough, we can pretend the sound doesn’t strike fear in our hearts. It does in mine. On the other hand, a fulfillment of his promises of ending the war in Iraq (ending, mind you, not stopping abruptly altogether and bailing ship), increasing energy independence, promoting universal health care, etc., just may convince me that it was not yet time for a female President.

I have to admit though. It is about d*mn time we do bring down those ceilings that Senator Clinton and Michelle Obama have referenced. Not only in terms of accepting strong willed women in our society but the full acceptance of racial diversity and of every type of discrimination. Whether we elect a female President or an African American President (please forgive the p.c.), our greatest achievement is that we have had that choice in the first place.

No longer in the shallow end

There are cuts that sever so deeply they may never heal.

They are not the same cuts that leave scars that fade with time. They are not the same cuts that bleed seemingly forever then stop abruptly as if it had never bled at all.

Strangely enough, though, it is a repeated wound and caused the same way as before…only, those scars all healed. But just as certain as the presence of that bleeding cut, you are certain that this cut will not mend. Perhaps because it’s been cut one too many times. Or perhaps because there just isn’t anymore room for healing. Mainly, it may be because it just doesn’t want to anymore…

And just as surely as I’ve recognized mine, when it comes, you’ll recognize your final cut too.

Promises

During many low, confusing…quietly anguished times in my life, I’ve often turned to Robert Frost’s guidance through his works of literary art. One I’m particularly fond of, you’ll find as a side page I’ve entitled “Clarity” in such that it gives me just that. However, today, Mr. Frost’s advice (as dependable as it usually is), did not give me the solace it so usually bestows. So I hunted down another one of his works. One that I had to do a personal interpretation of in my junior year of college. The poem always stayed with me. Like “The Road Less Traveled”, it clears the muddiness that has taken up residence in my brain. Though Robert Frost’s work has been criticized for it’s foreboding sense of death and suicide, I’m almost positive that it’s ingenuousness has never been disputed. More importantly, it lends to me the peace that I seek. I leave it here…just in case, yunno,…in case the muddiness is contagious. Many thanks RF!

Stopping by Woods on a Snowy Evening

Whose woods these are I think I know,
His house is in the village though.
He will not see me stopping here,
To watch his woods fill up with snow.

My little horse must think it queer,
To stop without a farmhouse near,
Between the woods and frozen lake,
The darkest evening of the year.

He gives his harness bells a shake,
To ask if there is some mistake.
The only other sound’s the sweep,
Of easy wind and downy flake.

The woods are lovely, dark and deep,
But I have promises to keep,
And miles to go before I sleep,
And miles to go before I sleep.

         — Robert Frost

…on exceptional fathers.

“It is easy for a father to have children than for children to have a real father.” ~Pope John XXIII

For all the men who sacrifice to let their children have real fathers,

Happy Father’s Day!

Instructions for Life

I found the following post in a blog by a really good friend of mine. I’ve missed her so and decided to visit her space. And maybe because I’ve been feeling “out of sorts” or maybe for absolutely no reason at all, the following post pulled at my heart. You’ll find my edits in RED. Enjoy.

1. Give people more than they expect and do it cheerfully.
2. Discover and Memorize your favorite poem.
3. Don’t believe all you hear, spend all you have, or loaf all you want.
4. When you say, “I love you,” mean it.
5. When you say, “I’m sorry,” look the person in the eye.
6. Be engaged at least six months before you get married.
7. Believe in love at first sight.
8. Never laugh at anyone’s dreams. People who don’t have dreams don’t have much.
9. Love deeply and passionately. You may get hurt, but it’s the only way to live life completely.
10. In disagreements, fight fairly. No name calling.
11. Don’t judge people by their relatives, or by the life they were born into.
12. Teach yourself to speak slowly but think quickly.
13. When someone asks you a question you don’t want to answer, smile and ask, “Why do you want to know?”
14. Take into account that great love and great achievements involve great risk.
15. Call your mother.
16. Say “God bless you” when you hear someone sneeze.
17. When you lose, don’t lose the lesson.
18. Follow the three Rs: Respect for self, Respect for others, Responsibility for all your actions.
19. Don’t let a little dispute injure a great friendship.
20. When you realise you’ve made a mistake, take immediate steps to correct it.
21. Smile when picking up the phone. The caller will hear it in your voice and just may need the lift.
22. Marry a person you love to talk to. As you get older, his/her conversational skills will be even more important.
23. Spend some time alone and ensure you don’t lose sight of YOU.
24. Open your arms to change, but don’t let go of your values.
25. Remember that silence is sometimes the best answer.
26. Read more books. Television is no substitute.
27. Live a good, honourable life. Then when you get older and think back, you’ll be able to enjoy it a second time.
28. Trust in God but lock your car.
29. A loving atmosphere in your home is the foundation for your life. Do all you can to create a tranquil, harmonious home.
30. In disagreements with loved ones, deal only with the current situation. Don’t bring up the past.
Remember that there’s no harm in a little spilled milk. Just don’t be so blind to realize that lost drop after drop will result in an empty bottle.

31. Don’t just listen to what someone is saying. Listen to why they are saying it.
32. Share your knowledge. It’s a way to achieve immortality.
33. Be gentle with the earth.
34. Pray or meditate. There’s immeasurable power in it.
35. Sometimes, saying “Thank You” is the best response when you are being flattered.
36. Mind your own business.
37. Don’t trust anyone who doesn’t close his/her eyes when you kiss.
38. Once a year, go someplace you’ve never been before, you needn’t even have to travel.

39. If you make a lot of money, put it to use helping others while you are living. It is wealth’s greatest satisfaction.

39a. Even if you don’t make a lot of money, remember that some spare change in the donation box will go to someone less fortunate than you.
40. Remember that not getting what you want is sometimes a wonderful stroke of luck.
41. Learn the rules so you know how to break get around them properly.
42. Remember that the best relationship is one in which your love for each other exceeds your need for each other.
43. Judge your success by what you had to give up in order to get it.
44. Live with the knowledge that your character is your destiny.
45. Approach love and cooking with reckless abandon but accept that no matter how much you’re loved, it will not make your cooking taste any better.

What year are we in, again?

One of my newest, growing (least fond) pet peeve:

“You’re not a man. Let me talk to a man. Because I’m a woman and I don’t know sh*t about cars.”

Yes, I’m not a man. Yes, by all means, you may talk to one of the men here. Yes, yes, it does seem that you’re quite stup…er…that you don’t realize that you’ve just insulted my intelligence.  HOWEVER, just because you’re a woman who “doesn’t know sh*t about cars,” under NO CIRCUMSTANCES should you assume that:

1. I’m a woman anything like you.
2. That I’ve been at this job for over 7 years, driven & owned a car for over 11 years and I’ve yet learned a single thing about either…like you.
3. That the men here know more than I do. (Some of them do, but I can “Debbie Guarantee” you that I know more about cars than at least one of the guys here.)

And last, but certainly not least…

That this “man” you’re asking to speak to is going to be able to answer the questions I’ve been trained to answer for you.

Now.  How may I help you?

On being a daughter and a mother…

…time and time again.

I’ve often mused over the fact that life surely does come full circle. Some of these circles don’t quite get completed for some, lap over several times for a few people and encircle completely for others. I was reminded of these facts of life a few years ago when my mother quit her full time job and moved back home, on an island away from here, to take care of her aging and ailing father and more recently last month when my own my mother was hospitalized in the intensive care unit.

Unfortunately, my thoughts are still a jumbled mess to make any sense of how I’ve decided that I will most likely be one of those few who will experience life overlapping. Fortunately though, I am clear enough to know that I am luckier than most.

This Mother’s Day, I can still wish my mother a “Happy Mother’s Day” and hear her utter the well wishes in return. Moreover, I’m at a great time in my life when the ages of my three daughters let me enjoy early morning kisses & hugs from my baby (age 7), promises of “no more fighting with my sisters” from my middle child who can already wear my shoes (age 8 ) and the feeling of pride knowing I must’ve done something right when my eldest (age 10) will without hesitation or remorse ask what time we will be visiting and dropping off gifts to their stepmother.

I am also at a special time in my life when I am old enough to understand and accept the wisdom from rare visits from my grandmother when she visits her daughter (my mother), her grandchildren (my siblings & I) and her grandchildren (my babies). I see her interaction with my family and I realize that, one day, that same woman offering up advice will be my mother and soon enough, one day will be me.

For now, though, I am happily (and still)…the daughter and grand daughter and mother.

Happy Mother’s Day.

Running behind…

It’s been a while since my last post. Again. I’m sorry. Let me catch up you to up speed, ok?

Remember my last post?  Well….

I fixed it!  (Yes, it counts as “fixed it” if you delegate it to someone else.  I say so.)

Then I lost it.

Then she lost it too. Must be contagious because…

…my baby lost her tooth and gave it to me to leave for the tooth fairy but then I lost it too.  I recall (in a really busy moment) brushing off my daughter and telling her that as long as she wrote a “note” to the Tooth Fairy, she’d visit.  Have I not taught my children anything at all?  Most especially not to be rude and unappreciative?  Help me, Lord.  We’ve a while to go yet. 

Then just last weekend, one of my best friends in the entire world…GOT PROMOTED TO STAFF SGT!  Congratulation Chrissy!

Oh!  And did I mention that I had just enough time left to fall in love?  I did.

…with this cute puppy Labrador retriever.  I’m picking her up, running and not looking back the next time she visits the office.

And that, ladies & gents, is your update. Happy to keep myself…er…you amused.

“If you can’t dazzle them with brilliance, baffle them with BULL…” -W. C. Fields

Says my Manager and good friend, “At RPM, we deal with a lot of Bullsh*t. But this one takes the trophy!”

Attempts at playing Handy-girl

I accomplished exactly 3 things over the weekend.

1. After my daughter (in a hour long blackout, insisting she was Invisible Girl) successfully created a gaping hole in the screen door leading to the patio, I removed, replaced the mangled screen & re-installed the sliding screen door.  I surprised myself even.
2. Decided I was (all of a sudden) Ms. Fix-it and attempted to figure out why the recently-replaced-but-didn’t-have-problems-previous-to-replacing-the-pipes kitchen sink was no longer draining quickly.  My brother and I got it in our heads that the reason why it was not draining anymore was because we replaced one pipe with a much shorter one and now it had insufficient pressure to drain.  Only, when I attempted to replace the pipes, I realized I didn’t have the right fittings.  Still no problem.  Just re-assemble the pipes back in until I got the right ones, right?  Wrong.  I couldn’t figure out how to put them back together.  Opening the cabinets under my kitchen sink now reveals a pile of odd shaped pipes and connectors…nowhere resembling the nice piping it used to be.
3. Gave myself a pounding headache & aching stomach (most likely from the green mango & salt I had in between my Ms. Fix-It events).

Hope your weekend was more successful than mine.